wizardseason | Wizard's House

Wizard's House

"Hey"

The Wizard greets the evil-allured knights the same way every night, with the same word, while casually sitting on the steps of the porch outside of her little home. The building looks handmade, like it was built by people who cared about the place they were going to live. Surrounding it on all sides are fields as far as the eye can see. Vegetables of all kinds, with fruit trees and bushes placed throughout the landscape. Closer to the home are bigger trees, willows and others, providing shade from the strange three suns above. Wherever this is, it isn't the world that the knights know.

Plunged into the ground a mere few feet away from the steps leading up to the home is a handwritten sign that states the following:

Knight Rules:
- Tell others if you want
- You can't reveal others
- The world ends this year

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She watches him take the raw bacon and says nothing, utterly unsurprised by what he's doing. He was taking all of this in stride so why wouldn't she? She's motioning her finger towards the sausage patties, making them flip as she gives her response.

"Then why are you waiting, pig knight?" She asks, wondering how far she can push him along. What limits did he have? But she can't help a tease, she can't help seeing what buttons she could push. Perhaps he was the princess type, and...

"Unless you'd rather be swept off your feet?"

He scoffs at the title, pig knight, and his nose wrinkles as he throws the folded up bacon into his mouth. What a tremendous turn off being called a pig is. It takes him out of the moment with her, so that when she offers to sweep him off his feet, he laughs, only barely flirting at this point.

"Are you offering?" He tilts his head, swallowing and licking his lips curiously. "You're so small this year."

What an easy way to get under his skin. If he asked her not to call him by that and, perhaps, offered a name she'd be inclined to do that. But as it stands, he didn't ask her not to call him by his knight status so she'll likely do it again. But she's in the business of catching knights off guard, so as she stands at the cooktop another one of her appears behind Gyre.

And she sweeps him off of his feet. If Gyre tries to resist, he'll find that his muscles don't react while she's holding him in her arms. She's looming over him, face mere inches from his with her wizard hat blocking out everything above them. Her hand is surprisingly strong against his back, holding him in place. It's only once she whispers "Why would I offer?" that Gyre can get back control of his body.

Have fun, Gyre, how much is she really messing with him here?

Matilda had woken up a little bit ago— but after muttering Five more minutes and rolling over and placing a pillow over her head, she just kind of chills in bed for a bit. It’s so comfy and cozy, but she can very distantly hear voices from somewhere, so she reluctantly rolls out of bed. She doesn’t seem to notice the fact that she’s in a strange place, or that her pajamas are significantly more pants-like than usual, just kind of shuffled out of the room, and down the long hall and—.

She jolts awake at the scene before her, cheeks glaring red and her hand moving to try and shield her dramatic gasp. “So very scandalous!”

Matilda's arrival allows the Wizard to mess with her, too. While she's apparently being completely scandalous, her voice comes from behind Matilda.

"It could be worse." she answers and, if Matilda looks, she'll find another Wizard leaning against the wall beside her.

If she looks back towards Gyre, and when Gyre blinks, he'll find himself laying flat on the floor like he hadn't been held at all. It's not like he was dropped, either, he's just placed there flat on his back on the floor. The Wizard who had swept him off of his feet is gone as quickly as she'd swept him.

And all the while, the Wizard who's at the cooktop is still there, still smirking slightly, and still idly cooking breakfast.

Well that was a whole thing. He definitely tries to struggle when she dips him, his eyes widening in... well, fear basically. She's done a good job being charming so far, but paralyzing him like that is absolutely terrifying. Even if it was only for a moment. Even if it was only for a joke.

Sufficed to say, he lays on the ground for awhile after he's left there, turning his head to look at Matilda with these wide, confused eyes.

"Hi."

When Haizea woke up in unfamiliar pajamas again, she decided she would tolerate this no longer. The pajama top she removes and ties around her waist like a jacket, the pants she rips into shorts. With her leotard on under the pajamas to begin with, and her style sufficiently reclaimed from the pajama fashion tyranny of the Wizard, she finally leaves her room and follows the smell of bacon that's been tempting her since she woke up.

She doesn't quite expect two Wizards, a scandalized Matilda and floor prone Gyre.

"Am I interrupting something?" she asks, eyebrows raised.

Matilda of course whips her head around to look at the Wizard behind her, her own cheeks flushing as she grins at her, and then back at Gyre— wait, where’d Gyre go? He’s on the floor. But she didn’t hear him fall. That’s perplexing, but it’s kind of surprising to see him looked so surprised, so she just giggles and gives a little flounce, rocking back on her heels. “Hi!” She chirps, before her attentions captivated by Haizea, and her majestic pajama shorts.

She can’t wipe the dumb grin off her face, and just giggles more. “Nooooo~”

The Wizard turns her head just slightly to acknowledge Haizea, the slightest hint of amusement in her voice when she sees the pajamas.

"That's not a bad idea." She offers. Is that a compliment? But when everyone blinks next, the second Wizard is gone. Now it's back to the one at the cooktop, still idly flipping the food with her magic.

"Any requests?"

She looks back and forth between all parties suspiciously for a moment, before deciding to let it go. She'll remember this, though.

"Bacon and eggs for me, thanks."

...wow, Matilda didn't narc on him. That's extraordinary. Maybe he misjudged her? He's honestly a little shocked when Haizea just seems to accept the answer and move on with her life, but he'll take it for now, sitting up finally.

He's still quite anxious about being paralyzed briefly, but he's trying to play it off, folding his legs like he's definitely comfortable just sitting here on the floor. He's good. Don't worry about him.

"Uh, I can take from what you've got there."

Matilda just kind of smiles at all other parties for a few awkward moments, then she makes herself at home and finds a seat at the table, perching there with her hands under her chin. “Just no scrambled eggs. Please.” She crinkles up her nose, feeling sick just at the thought. Then she’s back to sitting there as if eating breakfast in a dream is 100% normal.

The fact that this all could've been one freak accident, one shared nightmare between him and people he'd (mostly) never met before, that was how he got through this day. Maybe he was just so exhausted and passively triggered that the dream was just that- a dream.

FUCKIN' NOPE.

See, Garrot heard the same voices as last time, that's Bad; he also heard the Wizard's voice, and that's Double Bad. And they're in a house, in beds, in motherfucking pajamas and he hates this, Garrot hates this so much! Then he hears the sound of Matilda giggling, which is a very unprofessional thing to do when the fate of the world is at stake, so he finds himself livid, storming out of his room, all three hundred pounds of pissed off, parental stomping.

The scene before him makes his nostrils flare out, and he takes a deep breath in. They're ordering breakfast like it's fucking nothing, even though they'll have breakfast when they fucking wake up! Bullshit, bullshit, BULLSHIT!!

"Why don't you find the sharpest thing you can find, spear yourself in the damned head with it, and serve it to me on a platter!" He's screaming. He's pushed past anyone unfortunate enough to be between his room and the Wizard. And he's just. Looming over her. Glaring.

Edited 2019-04-18 23:33 (UTC)

Haizea asks for bacon and eggs and, true to her word, a plate of bacon and eggs slides across the counter on its own.

Gyre gets his pick of the food laying around.

Matilda gets a similar self-sliding plate but hers has a little bit of everything, a small serving of each breakfast food. Most importantly: Sunny side up eggs.

And then, of course.

There's Garrot.

As he approaches the Wizard, she lets his screaming moment pass but she mutes him the moment the word 'platter' leaves his lips. She isn't going to let him keep screaming, this is hardly the place for it. But she's not going to leave him unanswered. She's also not going to leave him feeling like his tirade had any effect on her at all.

"Would that make you happy?" She offers, knowing full well that he can't respond. "We both know it wouldn't."

And she deliberately waits thirty more seconds to unmute him, but she doesn't give even the slightest indication that she'd done so.

Haizea picks up a slice of bacon and chomps down on it. Crunchy, just the way she likes it.

“Damn Garrot, muted again?” she says around her mouthful, then gestures at the Wizard with a second piece of bacon. “Why don’t you make him a pancake that looks like your head instead? Bet your magic could whip up something like that.” Or could it? The Wizard’s sheer power and reality bending abilities are a given, but how much fine control does she have?

Oh good, Garrot's making a scene. He winces a little as the other starts screaming, only letting out a held breath when he's finally silenced.

At least the rest of the room is looking that way? It gives him the chance to get up finally, sneaking over to the counter to steal a raw egg. Which he'll just toss into his mouth whole while he watches this work itself out. The egg is crunched one (1) time before he swallows. Gross!

Matilda's actually too busy smiling at her plate to pay too much attention to Garrot's yelling. She trusts the Wizard not to hurt him, just make him quiet, which honestly, is kindof nice once and a while.

Unfortunately, that leaves her open to look up and watch Gyre put a fucking egg in his mouth, which means her breakfast is falling out of her mouth instead of being chewed.

Garrot can't tell the Wizard that the only thing that'd make him happy would be breaking her goddamn neck. He wants to shout and grumble and throw a tantrum but it's really hard to keep that motivation when you can't be fucking heard. It's basically his own personal HELL! So he simply rolls his eyes at Haizea's snark and watches Gyre slink off to the counter. Then there's the crunch of eggshells, and Matilda has stopped dead in her tracks. Garrot, eager to investigate and give the Wizard the cold shoulder, walks over. And it's at this moment that the mute seems to wear off.

"What, you've never seen someone eat a raw egg before?" How has Matilda never seen this? It's in so many movie workout montages! So he grabs an egg but instead cracks it over his mouth and the yolk and slime fall right into his mouth. Munch chomp. Almost like he's done this before. But then he faces the rest of the kitchen, eggshells still in his hands. "I mean, you can get salmonella so you really shouldn't eat a raw egg at all, Matilda." Garrot will be fine because he's a doctor and this is all a dream.

The Wizard's got a wild bunch this year, four totally different eggs sitting around her here in the kitchen. She answers Haizea's request by spinning a finger gently over the cooktop. A squirt-bottle filled with pancake batter starts floating above the surface and it uh... it goes to town on making a little wizard face on the cooktop. It looks pretty good!

Gyre, meanwhile, gets an extra egg rolled over to him. Eat up, carnivore! Matilda's meal doesn't stop smiling.

"Those eggs are safe, you could eat them all." A beat, then: "I won't let any of you die to an egg."

Huh, look at that, pancake art! She wonders if the Wizard is good at art naturally or if it’s because of the magic.

“Safe or not,” she says, making a bit of a face, “I bet they taste better cooked!” To illustrate her point, she cuts up a chunk of her eggs, which are fried, and chomps down. “Yep, pretty dang good.”

Watching Garrot eat a raw egg didn’t kill her appetite, but if Gyre eats another one whole that just might. Why these men so nasty.

Oh my god, he was trying to eat privately!! He doesn't eat eggs in front of these people for this exact reason!! He knows he's fucked the second Matilda looks at him, and then Garrot has to make it a whole thing. He sets his attention on the new egg he's being offered, picking it up and turning it over in his hand.

"If you say so," he mutters to Haizea, watching her eat a tragically cooked egg. It's not for him, and yes, unfortunately for her, he is going to eat his egg whole and raw because that's the way eggs are supposed to be eaten. His eyes shift over the lot of them as he does it before he settles his focus on the Wizard. He doesn't need his tastes criticized!!

"Why are you making food in a dream anyway?"

Matilda’s watching Garrot like she’s witnessing a deadly accident in slow motion. Her entire face falls into complete despair, her cheeks flush, there might even be tears welling—- she pulls her goggles down over her eyes and begins scarfing the smiley face breakfast aggressively. Can’t focus on gross egg eating if she’s busy eating her own cooked eggs!

Garrot just stares in awe as Matilda's face falls and she starts eating... because Gyre ate an entire raw egg. Maybe she realized how hungry she was? Either way...

"Oh, is that what we're doing?" Garrot's glance slides to Gyre, and suddenly he's smirking, and hey look, the doctor also pops a raw egg into his mouth, and monch cronch. See? He can be cool!

"Sho, shiddy Wizerr-" Chomp chew. How did Gyre do this in one bite? "Is it nighttime, or is that just stormclouds?" Why is it even raining if she can magic her weird crops? Also, this egg is like eating a dollar burger with the paper wrap still on.

Garrot keeps chewing. No point in the eggshells cutting his throat!

"It's raining, food helps knights bond." She answers, keeping her soft smirk on her face as she watches the raw egg shenanigans unfold. Good thing Haizea and Matilda are eating the cooked eggs, otherwise they'd go to waste. After a few moments, all the sound from the cooktop ceases and the room is left only with the ceaseless sound of the rain outside.

Which should answer Garrot's question. It's just a storm.

"I won't be cooking tomorrow night, we'll be outside again."

Haizea continues to make a face at Garrot and Gyre, but especially at Garrot because she can just feel how performative his whole egg eating is. Gyre at least didn’t make a big deal about it! She shoots a conspiratory glance towards Matilda and shrugs with a sigh. At least the two of them aren’t comitting food crimes!

“I wonder if I could make the rain stop?” she muses, but doesn’t actually try. It’s kind of nice to hear the rain outside and she’s still got bacon to eat. She’s unsure how much headway she’ll make on the eggs for a while.

She perks up a bit when the Wizard says they’ll be outside tomorrow, she’s lowkey been thinking about the lake Gyre took a dip in last time. The desire to swim in it is STRONG.

Edited 2019-04-20 02:52 (UTC)

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